Sunday, June 7, 2009

I just don't know what to do with myself...

You know that song with that line in the lyrics? I don't remember what the rest of the song was about, but that line is popping into my head.

Sometimes I can't get too specifically personal on my blog, which drives me nuts. There are things I would like to say and put into words to help me process my thoughts, but I'm afraid of people reading it and jumping straight to their own assumptions.

Hell, who cares.

My marriage is still pretty rough. I'm at the point where I honestly don't know if this is going to work, or if I think it is even supposed to work. I'm tired of having conversations about what needs to happen, followed by very little (if any) action. I'm tired of being the belittled and berated scapegoat. I'm tired of being judged by someone who is not innocent. I'm tired of not feeling like I'm as amazing as I really am.

What the hell am I supposed to do?


Ashley said...

Seriously call me i'm free for lunch any day!

Anonymous said...

I just found your blog today. This post is a little old, and it sounds like things are getting better.

From the other side of it, let me promise that fixing a marriage is way easier than getting a divorce.

Divorce only ends the marriage, not the problems that led you there, and it creates a host of new problems as well.

I wish you well.